I met the love of my life at Beckett Thermal Solutions, formerly Beckett Gas, Inc.
I was working in production setup for water heaters, and she was placed as a temporary worker in water heaters. After the temporary period, she was hired in as a full-time employee. She was dating another guy that also works there, and had been for 2 years before I met her.
Their relationship was painful to watch. I couldn’t stand seeing her so happy and carefree when she was away from him and then seeing her looking miserable because he wanted her to sit next to him during every break and just scroll on her phone.
I wanted to see her have the capability of being independent from him, especially with the way he was treating her publicly. For Valentine’s Day, I got her a card with $20 in it to go towards her “car savings” just in-case he didn’t get her a present.
When the guy broke up with her, he accused her of cheating on him with me. Our relationship at that point was platonic. We hadn’t kissed or held hands or anything yet. He threw her clothes into the front yard while it was raining. After she was living with me, he begged for her back. I was determined not to let her go back to being treated that way.
I try to lead in my relationship by example. I’m not tit-for-tat kind of guy. I have forgiven a lot, but I myself am not perfect by any means. Cheating is something I don’t understand. It’s not something I would ever do, under any circumstances. I can’t exactly wrap my mind around how people get it in their heads that what another person doesn’t know won’t hurt them. The people I care about are always at the forefront of my mind. I may joke about them, but I would never do anything that I know would cause indescribable pain.
We have been together now for 7 years. We are domestic partners. When I lost my job at Beckett years ago, I told her to leave. I did not see me having the capability to continue to take care of her the way I had been doing. She saw it somehow, and I am thankful that she did. She didn’t leave. Now I am fighting again for the both of us. We have both been mistreated and screwed over multiple times by the people that are supposed to care about us.
Something popped in my head today that I haven’t thought about in a while. When my partners ex broke up with her and she was walking around with me during breaks one of the production supervisors made a comment to me about stealing another man’s woman. Dorphine Desouza was the one who made this comment to me. I want to make this clear- I did not steal anyone’s woman in the traditional sense as implied. I did not lie to her at all. I asked her to demand better for herself. This comment was made while I was still in production setup, right before I was moved into the front office.
At the time, I was still living at my parents. I saved up fast and I got us an apartment. She quit because of the anxiety of having to be near her ex and still work on 2nd shift while I was moved to 1st shift. She still had another job. He ruined her to the friend group that she was hanging around with at the time and had to start over when it came to friends. Then, it seemed, even those friends turned against her. Bad advice in the face of maturity was the worst of it.
When it came to meeting her family, things started off okay. I met her sister that’s closest to her in age and it seemed like we got along at first. After a few years, she changed. She started acting with a complete disregard for either of us. My partner just put up with it, she never said anything in front of me to her. I couldn’t stand watching her get walked all over. Her youngest sister liked me at first, but when the older sister changed, she did as well. The middle sister hasn’t spoken a word to me, and neither has her mother. I have been over their house multiple times; I have even been the one to speak first and greet her. To this day my partners mother hasn’t spoken a single word to me in over 7 years. My partner’s grandfather is the same way.
It’s a shame. I’m an open book, but everything her family knows about me was filtered through her anger. After being with her for 7 years, I know how to take her when she’s angry. Apparently, the people she lived with for most of her life do not. When we first got together and moved out, I was invited for family pictures for Christmas. It was my partner inviting me, but I know the invitation extended from her family.
The way her family treats her reminds me a lot of how my family treated me. Me and my partner are both the oldest, with multiple siblings of the same sex. I’m not close with my siblings. I tried to be there for them, but I don’t expect they will ever be there for me.
Right now, while I’m jobless, I drive my partner to school and work every day. I even stop up at her work every day to visit her for lunch to keep her company.